It’s still a couple more weeks until 2018 officially ends, but I’ve definitely identified this one.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned is this: there is no point thinking or worrying about what other people do or think, especially if it doesn’t directly affect me.
I’m guilty of gossiping about other people and occasionally being snarky or mean. I’m not proud to admit it. It’s one of the things about myself that I would like to change. It usually starts from a place of “I need to unload my feelings about X” or “I need to figure out how to deal with Y”. But it’s so easy to go from there and have a full on gossip session.
Last year, a friend helped me realise that it was taking up a lot of my energy and this year I realised that I did have a choice in what I thought about. (Yes — it took a year to really sink in.)
I’m not saying I’m not going to care about my friends’ lives. I still love talking to them about their lives and vice versa. Rather, I’m no longer going to think about them any longer than I have to. There’s no point in worrying or ruminating about other people — I’ve got my own life to live. (Especially if they’re not truly friends in the real sense of the word. Why should I worry myself with what they’re up to?)
This is also linked with my resolution to stalk people less (haha!). I realised I couldn’t be bothered looking up other people’s lives anymore. “They have nothing to teach me,” I remember thinking. There’s no real point in picking apart someone else’s life. There’s no need to satisfy pointless curiosities.